The day Gary Carter made me feel worthless

Ya, I know right?  After two very long, hot practices and a kids clinic today we got the, eh, I don’t know if I’d say once in a lifetime opportunity, but rare opportunity to meet hall of famer Gary Carter. It was completely out of nowhere but apparently he is a coach/philanthropist  for/through Palm Beach Atlantic University, which I’m still convinced isn’t a real place. We drove by a deserted 10 acres of land with nothing on it, and I mean nothing on it except for one thing, a sign that read Welcome to Palm Beach Atlantic University. I smell scandal. If you’re going to try to snake your way to the top of the NCAA, you may as well make a viable effort to have some people believe you.  Let me tell you Gary, you’re not fooling these academically inclined St. Bonaventure Bonnies. (What? We are ranked in the top 5 in two categories on Princeton review; #5 in hard liquor, #3 in beer. We like to party, so?)

Some of you, especially you stingy Met fans, are probably wondering why I’m being so rough on Gary Carter. I’m just going to come out and say it, dude’s a douche. I’m sorry but he was completely incapable of getting anything through to these kids. In fact, he was completely incapable of getting anything across except how great he is and reiterating to everyone how we will all never be him. He made that very clear. The age range of the kids at this clinic was 5-15 (majority between 7-10).  That means the oldest kid would have been born in 1996, completely eliminating the assumption that he was even a thought of mommy and daddy’s at the time of Carter’s retirement in 1992. The point is, none of these strapping young gentleman gives a damn that you were part of <1% of the world to be elected into the hall of fame because there’s a very good chance not a single one of them have any idea who you are. They want you to show them how to hit homeruns, chew sunflower seeds or atleast blow a bubble.  Instead, Carter kept going off on his self-absorbing tangents about being the only representative from the Expos to participate in the 1976 All Star game or how you “either have it or you don’t”, and that he did. Also, no disrespect Mr. Carter, but you’re a career .262 hitter and you’re preaching to these kids how easy it was to hit a curveball.  Nope, take that back, plenty of disrespect. 

Overreaction? Maybe. Something about him just rubbed me the wrong way. Whatever it was, it officially dropped Gary Carter down on my list of all-time favorite catchers. Good news is, Sal Fasano has moved to the front of the line. He may not have a World Series ring, 11 all-star appearances and 3 gold gloves but he isn’t an arrogant prick. Plus, he was 2nd in the American League in 1998 in hit-by-pitches, that’s got to count for something, right?